The increased dose of my antidepressant, duloxetine is finally kicking in and I am feeling a lot better. I haven’t had an anxiety attack for a week. Even though I am in a major flare up of the fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue I am able to cope with it. I’ve also been able to look after my Mum this week when she’s been unwell with a chest infection.
I’ve done a second class of yoga and have identified that I have no balance whatsoever. Any pose that involves going on one leg sees me wobbling about and falling over. David is worse than me so I am in good company. I am enjoying yoga but find it tough going; after 30 minutes I’m dripping in sweat. I’m so glad the room is in semi-darkness because I’m sure my face is bright red. I love the endorphin high I get after class so it’s worth the pain.
I’d really like to start swimming again but I’m a bit embarrassed about my appearance. As I’ve lost over a 100lb the skin on my tummy, arms and thighs has become really wrinkly and just hangs (I am planning on having a tummy tuck when I’ve lost my remaining weight). I know the skin on my tummy won’t show under my swimming costume. It’s a bit ironic because when I was bigger I was still embarrassed about being seen in a swimming costume. I think I just need to get over it.
At the moment David and I are doing life laundry. It is long overdue and the clutter has really been getting me down. The hardest thing for me is getting rid of things that my children have made. I literally can’t keep it all. I have 4 crates of stuff that I’d like to get down to 1 but I’m not sure I have the heart to get rid of anything. Having grown up children is great but I miss my babies.